When I’m talking to someone and I ask them why something is “why?” the other person will get defensive and not be able to ask you what you want to ask, so you can ask, “Is it because XXXX?” If you guess the hypothetical reason, the person will say, “It’s not that…I’ll tell you why! If you can guess the reason, they will go into a “it’s not that, is it?
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I know this.
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When you want to have a constructive discussion about someone’s opinion, it is better to write that person’s opinion on the whiteboard and say, “I think this is ◯◯◯” so that it will not be taken as a denial of personality. The human bug of thinking that “opinions are tied to personalities” can be overcome with a little ingenuity.
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Once the “human bug” is identified, a fix can be developed for it.
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Knowledge of “Corrective patches for humans” can be applied to different situations.
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As with open source software development, “Improved people” can be developed by accumulating patches.
This page is auto-translated from /nishio/「なぜ」ではなく「〜だから？」 using DeepL. If you looks something interesting but the auto-translated English is not good enough to understand it, feel free to let me know at @nishio_en. I’m very happy to spread my thought to non-Japanese readers.